Spring 2011 update 1

Listenin' to my jamz before I head out to my 11pm class. I'm really enjoying my mornings. Tuesdays and Thursdays are my easy-going days. I likkkke.

Anyway, a little update:

Things are looking up. My books are very expensive this year, so hopefully school funding will assist me. I've been pretty happy (but tired) this week. I'm getting into the swing of things. It was a mere month long break, but I'm still on vacation mode. Almost off though.

I've been reflecting about my life and plans. It's been tiring and a little stressful. I'm not sure what I want to do this summer. I'm thinking of going abroad...volunteering in a different country. I've never flown to a different continent, so that should be an awesome experience.

I've been doing quite a bit of reading. I can't wait to completely settle into my classes.

Aight. I'll write soon.

D

Changes

I've been feeling so un-Dominique lately. Really pessimistic and down. That's really unlike me. I can't really attribute these changes to any one thing. It could be a mix of a lot of things. I know we sometimes have to crash and hit rock bottom in order to be reborn into better beings. I'm waiting for that next phase to commence.

A flash into what's been going on. Just finished up my winter break. I spent time at my dad's for x-mas. Headed back to bean town for a couple days. The tail end of my break was spent with my mom, family, and gf in California. I had fun. But there were a few times when I seriously thought I was losing my mind. I've been letting negative vibes infiltrate my spirit. That's not a good thing.

So, I figure I should start doing more of the things I know make me happy. Music. Writing. Swimming. Drawing. Blogging. Watching videos. Reading. Spending time with loved ones.

It's easy to let negativity in. It's even easier to get lost in a world of criticism and complaining. I am the first person to admit that I am a BIG complainer. I need to stop that shit. The thing is, it's hard not to complain when you're unhappy or simply dissatisfied. I want to be satisfied. I want to quench this inner thirst, a thirst that can only be relieved by being happy with myself.

First off, I have become rather sedentary. I haven't exercised in a loooong minute. I hardly wear make-up or get dressed up. I don't like to look in the mirror. I am the heaviest I've ever been. I can feel it without stepping on a scale. It's not about weight. It's about being content with my being. I tend to let school run my life. I do find much success in academics. But, academia is NOT everything. I have to pay more attention to all the little and big parts in my life that I have neglected all last semester. It's eating me alive.

So, I have to make some changes because my confidence is seriously lacking and my positive vibe is being masked by negative energy.