A new day. Day number two, and I'm feeling good. I woke up earlier than necessary, ate a little breakfast, and made my way to the library. It's nice to get things started bright and early. I'll most likely conk out tonight. That sounds good. Real good. Yesterday wasn't a bad day. But, today feels right. Starting a new job and class can be stressful. I won't lie, I probably took out some of my anxiety on my girlfriend. That's never a smart thing to do. But, I'm reminded of how shitty that feels, and I don't want to get dirty. It's important to keep the vibes high and real. To appreciate what we have when we have it. I have a lot. A great mom at home. A great school to call my Alma mater. A comfortable room to call home. A wonderful and sweet girlfriend to call my own. And loving friends that keep me laughing and smiling. It's all good in this hood.
Things on my mind? As you can see, all of this is just rambling going on in my head. But, I do have something to talk about. I'm wondering what I will do for Christmas. Will I go back to Cali? Will I stay in Massachusetts or possibly Connecticut? Or will I see my father?
Home? I love seeing my family. I miss them already. But, not everybody is going to be home for the holidays. Should I even go that far for just a few days?
MA or CT? My girlie or my bestie? I hate being away from them. It would be nice to be here. But, I don't want to inconvenience their families.
Father? Well, seeing as he won't even return my calls, it seems less than likely that I will fly there for the holidays. Disappointing. But, this just shows me that he can never say I didn't try. I try all the time. Is he my number one priority? No. But, I think of him everyday. And, it's a shitty feeling to doubt whether we have reciprocal sentiments.
Idk. I have to figure it out. I kind of want to go to Hawai'i. Let me check the prices.
Peace.
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