3rd Year Excitement

We only have a couple days until we arrive on campus. We've done this twice, but this time feels right. The first time I moved to college, I ventured alone. The second time was better, but there were a lot of confusing logistics. This time, we will be arriving together, and what's better is that we are rooming together this year. I am excited for the companionship we will share, and I am so looking forward to the strength and prosperity I know will come. I have never been more serious about a relationship in my life, and I have zero reservations. I want to move forward, grow, and discover all the beauty that lies within our relationship.

best friends?

As I grow older and reflect on my life and the people in it, I think of all the moments when I'd develop and be consumed by "best friendships." I think of this often because I cannot help but see the link between the relationships I've had with bfs and my romantic relationships with women. I remember the intensity and strength of my best friendships. I also remember falling so hard for my best friends; falling in the sense that I always wanted to be in their presence and I always wanted them to feel the same way about me as I felt for them. I remember sleepovers and secrets. I remember their beautiful bodies, bodies that they willingly and unintentionally shared with me. I remember the sting between my thighs and the dryness of my mouth. And, I remember how natural it all felt for me. I wanted to touch them and be deep inside their thoughts. As I grew older, the intensity of those relationships grew stronger. Even simple tiffs between two friends soon progressed into sad, long-drawn out, and emotionally exhausting ordeals. There was nothing worse than being ignored by those girls. There wasn't a thing I wouldn't have done for those girls in times of conflict. I'd write these letters, practically pouring my heart to them. I mean, what a gesture! They were like relationships. I mean, they were relationships. Not sexual, not even romantic, but they had the bones of a real blown out relationship. My God.

courtesy of toihorn2

click my light on!
I want you so bad
I want you so closely
I feel your energy
you change my frequency
heaven sent you to me
you're supposed to be with me

so click my light on!
click my light on
click my light on
click my light on
click my light on

yellow sticky notes

i drew a book today about our life together
the pages were sticky notes, yellow
and they were fastened together with two staples at the top
and it revealed all the glorious and triumphant feats of our dedication
and yet
we had a fight of indifference
where you took your jeans off the doorhook, slipped them on, grabbed your bag
and proceeded to place your valuables one-by-one in it as fast as you could
you said the distance would be good for us, that you'd be back in an hour
and two hours later you come home, night pitch black, and me
in the same spot, just a little bit cleaner.